Navigating the aftermath of a loved one's death can be complex when one doesn't follow a specific religious doctrine. In the absence of a guiding belief system, we may question how to honour the departed and understand their destination. While a religious community offers comfort for some, those without such connections may grapple with feelings of disorientation and fear. The absence of a pre-established framework to confront death prompts a profound need to rewire our understanding of existence.
We can embrace fragments of online wisdom or adopt practices shared by others, creating a unique fusion of beliefs, our own collection of insights that resonate. This process of crafting an individualized approach provides a focal point, a channel for the love that can no longer be expressed directly.
Death can shake the very foundation of our earthly experience. In seeking faith (be it in science, spirituality, or a ‘work in progress’ belief system), we endeavour to make sense of death on a quest for meaning.
Buddhist mourning practices are guided by the central principle of the impermanent nature of existence. Buddhism holds the belief in the cycle of birth, death, and rebirth. According to this belief, when an individual dies, their consciousness is reborn into a new form based on their accumulated karma, or actions, from past lives. The goal of Buddhist practice is to attain nirvana, release from suffering and the cycle of rebirth, leading to a state of eternal peace and enlightenment.
Cremation is thought to release the soul from the physical body and facilitate its journey into the next life or state of existence. Buddhists believe it takes the deceased 49 days from death for their consciousness to undergo various stages of transition, encountering different visions and experiences. The rituals and prayers performed during this period are believed to guide and support the deceased on their journey, helping them navigate through the in-between states towards a positive rebirth.
Loved ones make offerings of food, water, incense, and flowers to the deceased as a gesture of respect. Prayers and chants may also be recited to invoke blessings for the departed soul. Buddhists perform acts of merit, such as giving donations to monks or charity, or performing acts of kindness, this is believed to benefit the deceased in their journey through the afterlife.
Family members continue to engage in meditation and reflect on the interconnectedness of all beings, to provide solace and perspective. Meditation may also be used to cultivate compassion and generate positive intentions for the deceased and all beings.
The concept of heaven and hell plays a crucial role in Christianity, with those leading a righteous life being rewarded with eternal bliss in heaven, and those who do not, facing consequences in hell. According to Christian doctrine, believers in God will be resurrected to new, glorified bodies at the time of Christ's second coming. Christianity offers comfort in the face of death through the promise of eternal life with God. The assurance of God's love and the hope of reunion with loved ones who have died provide solace to grieving individuals.
Christian funerals often involve prayers, hymns, and a eulogy. Burial practices vary, with some preferring burial while others opt for cremation. Mourners may wear dark coloured clothing as a symbol of mourning on the day of the funeral. Christian traditions may include memorial events and gatherings during the first year to support the grieving family.
In Islam, the understanding of death revolves around the idea that it is a transition to the afterlife. Righteous individuals are rewarded with entry into paradise, while others may face punishment in hell. The belief in judgment day is central, where every soul is held accountable for their deeds.
Islamic funerals are conducted swiftly, usually within 24 hours. The body is washed, wrapped in a simple cloth, and buried facing Mecca. Mourning is encouraged but excessive grief is discouraged. In Islam, there is a mourning period of three days, during which the family of the deceased refrains from certain activities and may receive visitors offering condolences. This period is followed by a longer mourning period known as "iddah," which lasts for four months and ten days for widows and divorced women. The annual memorial of the death may involve charitable acts and prayers.
Judaism's perspective on death is rooted in the idea of an afterlife, where the righteous are resurrected. However, there is a strong focus on the importance of leading a moral and unprejudiced life in the present world.
Jewish funeral practices include a quick burial, often within 24 hours. The period of mourning is known as "shiva," which lasts for seven days following the burial. During shiva, mourners typically stay at home, receive visitors, and recite prayers. After shiva, there is an additional period of mourning known as "shloshim," which lasts for 30 days. The full mourning period for a parent lasts for a year.
Mourners may wear torn black ribbons or traditional black clothing during this period. Rituals and gatherings during this time provide ongoing support. Jewish customs emphasize the importance of burial as a respectful way to return the body to the earth. The unveiling of the headstone occurs, and family and friends may continue to visit and share memories.
Hinduism encompasses a cycle of death and rebirth known as reincarnation. The soul, or Atman, undergoes this cycle until it reaches moksha, a state of liberation from the cycle of rebirth. Death is seen as a transition to another form of existence based on one's karma.
Hindu funerals involve cremation, with ashes often scattered in a sacred river. Mourning practices vary but often the ceremonials last for a period of 10 to 13 days after death, during which prayers and offerings are performed. Annual death anniversaries, known as "shraddha," may be observed for many years after the death. Family members may continue to remember the departed through rituals and personal acts of devotion.
Sikhism views death as a natural part of the divine plan. The soul is believed to merge with the divine after death. Sikhism emphasizes the importance of selfless service and devotion to God during one's lifetime.
Sikh funerals involve prayers, hymns, and readings from the Guru Granth Sahib. Cremation is preferred. Mourning is accepted, but Sikhs are encouraged to accept God's will. An annual remembrance may involve community events and acts of service. Family members continue to honour the departed through prayers and reflection.
In Confucianism and Taoism, death is seen as a transformation rather than an end. Ancestor worship is significant, emphasizing the continuation of familial bonds after death.
Funeral practices in Confucianism and Taoism involve elaborate rituals, ancestor worship, and offerings. Mourning periods and practices can vary among different regions. Family members may wear traditional black or white clothing as a symbol of respect as the ceremonies and offerings continue to honour the departed, extending the grieving process into the year following the death.
New Age perspectives often view death as a doorway to higher states of consciousness or spiritual realms. Some believe that the soul continues its journey beyond physical death, evolving and expanding in awareness. There's a belief in energy fields and spirits staying close to their loved ones after passing. Individuals may seek communication with passed loved ones through practices like visiting clairvoyants.
Attire during mourning could reflect the personality of the dead, or be flowing clothing to symbolize spiritual freedom. Seeking communication with passed loved ones is a unique aspect of this perspective. Practices like meditation and connecting with spiritual guides may continue long after the death of a loved one and represent ongoing spiritual growth. Rather than focusing solely on grief and loss, New Age perspectives on death may emphasize celebrating the life and legacy of the deceased.
